So I cut down my first Christmas tree today. My husband was going to do it but it started to pour rain, as it typically does here in Portland, Oregon. I have been determined for years to go as a family and cut down a tree together. But Justin was convinced it'd just be a scene from National Lampoons Christmas, with three kids and all . . . All the mud and mess and God knows what else. So I ventured out alone to find the perfect tree. I went to a local farm and walked for a good half hour searching for that perfect tree. I finally found one, and it is close to perfect. A good Douglas. I named the tree "Fred" and felt an automatic relationship such as I have never had with a tree. You can laugh, it may sound silly. But really I think people really don't appreciate all that a typical Christmas tree is. This tree that I have is older then all of my children. It's been around half of my life. Think of all the water and energy it took for this tree to grow. All so that I could cut it down and bring it to my living room. I recently took a Medicinal Herb class where my teacher talked about plants as if they were people. I thought she was a little crazy for that. She said that she asked plants "permission" before cutting or harvesting them. I don't think she's crazy though. I think there is something to that. I personally am very grateful for this beautiful tree that is just a few feet from me now in my living room. It's majestic, beautiful, almost magic, and the aroma is just soothing to the mind.
I think when we buy a tree off the side of the road we can't really appreciate it as much. We didn't search for it, we didn't work for it. We don't know its origins or from where it came half the time. It feels different to search and find a tree, to choose just one among many, and then actually get down on your knees with a saw and cut through it. I never have cut through a tree before and after about ten minutes of sawing, dripping with water, covered in mud and decorated with pine needles I had success. It was really quite exhilarating to be able to cut my own tree down. It feels so good to work for things sometimes, to get your hands dirty, you know?
So this tree is about fourteen years old and about 9 1/2 feet tall. Quite the tree. My point is take a little time to be thankful for your tree this year. Have a little reverence for it. Tree hugger's have a little bit of a point.
Later that day I went with my family to a contemplative Christmas service at a very old and beautiful church in SE Portland. Old Laurelhurst Church. We arrived very late, having got lost, and only were able to catch the last twenty minutes. But it was a very, very, quiet Christmas service and I think we ticked some folks off coming in late. Not what I expected it to be. We had some friends come with us and we were all in a different mind set when we arrived. We were just listening to Led Zepplin and a variety of other songs on the radio, we had to find parking. We then had to run in and drop our kids off, then we finally got in there and as soon as we sat down we just about bursted out laughing. It was hard to contain ourselves. We were trying to be quiet and respectful, honestly. It sort of felt like middle school again when you're in the class room and the teacher is talking and you and a friend just find something hilarious that no one else understands. It's not that anything was that funny, its just transitioning from normal every day life to a very quiet and sober service was almost impossible.
The church itself was amazing architecturally. Intricate stained glass windows line the walls, wooden pews, soft lighting. You'd expect I'd feel something. But sometimes God isn't found in stained glass windows.It was a very Greek Orthodox sort of service, which is awesome if you're in the right mind set. But when we walked in it was dead silent.And from some corner we heard a voice say"Jesus" and then there was silence, and then we heard "Flesh". I don't know why it set us off, but it just came off hilarious because we were expecting a completely different service, this one was a bit over the top serious for us. I was in the mood to worship and celebrate the birth of Christ, not to act as if it were the funeral of God. To me it felt sad and cold. I think who ever planned the service meant it to be contemplative and a time for very serious reflection. But for some reason it just didn't reach into my soul.
After words we ended up going to the Grotto. Which I would suggest to anyone visiting or living in Portland. Its really quite a special experience. Lots of lights and as you walk up this path there are speakers telling you the Christmas story. There is a very realistic looking Nativity scene, candles, puppet shows for the kids, live animals to pet . . . The best part is the cathedral. Inside there is constant music. A choir comes to sing every hour or so. How special to sit with my kids and listen together. Maisie really enjoyed it. At the end of a song, solely played with the magical sound of bells, the entire audience sang "O come all ye Faithful". What a great moment in time. I wish I could have sat there all night. Really. I felt "God" more in those brief moments of simple people coming together and singing then I did in the hard pews of the previous church. There was more joy there I guess.
There were some wonderful moments.
When I came home I felt a little stressed though. It can be draining to take the kids everywhere, but the smile on their faces is worth it. I came in tonight and logged in to my myspace page and heard Seth Martin's version of Go Tell It On The Mountain. Wow. It was just refreshing . Sometimes God isn't found in stained glass windows and serious Christmas services, sometimes you can hear Him in the banging of a garbage can as a drum, voices belting out "Jesus Christ is Lord". Listen for yourself http://www.myspace.com/sethmartinsmusic
